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Japanimal Massacre

Thursday night was opening night for my brand new friend Sullivan Dunn’s art exhibit “Japanimals” at 008. It started off with red wine, art talk and pictures of cute little doggies but soon progressed into one of the most horrifyingly awesome Thursdays in recorded history.

The first thing to go awry was a little girl who goes by the street name Puddlepatch. I’m not sure what initially sparked Puddlepatch’s bravery although I’m told she was either refused alcohol or was kicked out, but I do know that she was involved in some sort of dispute and felt the need to react. She did so by pulling down her pants and placing her drunken buttocks on the front window of 008. At that point I felt the need to exit the premises. Then me and Todd followed Android to a wine tasting, before taking shots at Penthouse, and blabbing it up and with Kissyface and Tamara at Souyia. Down the steps, on our way out, Tamara knocked over a beer bottle which scared the shit out of Android because he mistakenly thought it was some dude throwing beer bottles at us (Android was under the impression that he had rudely closed the exit door on some random guy who felt the need to retaliate by hurling beer bottles at us.) Anyway, Android is all rushing us down the stairs while I’m staging a struggle to get up the stairs to fight the pretend guy who didn’t really throw the bottle. He’s all like “No! It’s not worth it!” and holding me back from the fight and pushing me down the stairs until he can alert the bouncers to the threat of the enraged bottle-thrower.

When we get outside we realize that our next stop, Tango, is over a 1/2 block away. Not wanting to walk that far in the miserable Carolina winter we opt to take a cab. When the cabbie asks us our desired location we tell him 2nd and Princess which was by that time exactly where we were at. So he yells at us and charges us $3 and we get out and go into Tango where Puddlepatch is drunk and keeps falling down on her head. At some point my brother Homeless Steve slapped my screwdriver out of my hand and onto the floor where it smashed into itty bitty pieces. The bartenders yelled at me and I offered to sweep it up. That was about 1 in the A.M. and that’s when I decided to refrain from alcohol.

This entry was posted on Saturday, February 4th, 2006 at 1:12 pm and is filed under Party People. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.

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